Prologue: Live Life

omg so damn tired! my quads still hurt kinda. its been 3 days already! just got myself another journal, yet again. this space is getting too public for my own liking. fewer updates here from now on. 'twas great having you, hairyplanes!

Thursday, February 26, 2009 @ 7:59 PM

i'm on my 3rd drawing, re-drawing i mean. when i look at my previous sketches, i feel so unsatisfied. i'm wasting paper and the trees haha! its so competitive, getting into NTU's ArtDesignMedia. Grrrrr!

Grad show meeting this evening blaaaahh i'm serious it's gonna be a 2-men show again. I will make careful decisions on team mates for future team projects in time to come. MARK MY WORDS. FYP has really taught me well.

@ 12:00 AM

THIS PERSONALITY QUIZ SCARES ME. ITS ANSWERS ARE ALMOST TRUE, ITS WEIRD.

Your view on yourself:

You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:

You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:

You prefer to get to know a person very well before deciding whether you will commit to the relationship.

The seriousness of your love:

You like to flirt and behave seductively. The opposite sex finds this very attractive, and that's why you'll always have admirers hanging off your arms. But how serious are you about choosing someone to be in a relationship with?

Your views on education

Education is less important than the real world out there, away from the classroom. Deep inside you want to start working, earning money and living on your own.

The right job for you:

You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:

You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:

You are afraid of things that you cannot control. Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel.

Who is your true self:

You like privacy very much because you enjoy spending time with your own thoughts. You like to disappear when you cannot find solutions to your own problems, but you would feel better if you learned to share your thoughts with a person you trust.

Tuesday, February 24, 2009 @ 6:29 PM

OMG URGHHHHHHH! Now i wish i had been 20 yrs on the day of the Aquathlon race. I would've gotten 3rd damnit! :'(

click to enlarge

Those small kids are fishes seriously, they've got fins instead of arms and gills instead of lungs!

Sunday, February 22, 2009 @ 9:38 PM

weekends spent w/ ling er

The weekends have been great!
What a way to start my hols.

Sat, we went to Novena to collect our race kits for Sun's Aquathlon. Quite a pity i didn't manage to find UDDERS ice cream parlour. But we settled for Ben & Jerry's @ Raffles. Still as yummmy!

Today, i had the experience of my life. My first swim in the sea, the night before i kept thinking, "what if i drown, how does sea water taste like, am i going to make it" hahaha the last time i swam was a month ago and the last time i really swam in the sea was 10yrs ago. I couldn't go to bed, was feeling all jittery and excited! Man, this is so much more exciting compared to the previous races i did this year.

CONGRATS MY FRIEND, FOR GETTING 1ST!
WHOOOHOO!

I'm feeling pretty refreshed right now. What was supposed to be a short 1hr nap became a 2hr sleep. But i ain't complaining!

Saturday, February 21, 2009 @ 12:38 AM

a journey

19 years of existence yet still so much to learn and understand.

wassup with guys and their vulgar language. its like the only words in their vocab are f/cb/knn wtf? i was having dinner at eunos while eavesdropping a guy's convo over his phone. actually not really eavesdropping cos he was just LOUD.

sometimes people try too hard to perfect their lives, "i wanna inject in purpose/goal to my life" blablabla. or maybe i'm just a cynic, because whatever we do, at the end of the day we're still gonna end up in ashes or buried. perhaps i'm just jealous and envious of others 'fulfilling' lives. look at mine, i'm stuck at a crossroad. my main concern right now is what if either ntu or nus doesn't accept me? i dont want to plunge straight in to the workforce yet. i feel so directionless why do we always have to be on our toes. school is just over, almost immediately another worry comes smashed straight into my face. sometimes i wished i was a guy, so i have another 2 yrs in army to think and consider my choices. haha i'm good at this. running away.

Friday, February 20, 2009 @ 1:42 PM

FYP

GRAD SHOWCASE
10th-11th MARCH, 2009
@ SINEMA OLD SCHOOL

BE THERE OR BE SQUARE!

Thursday, February 19, 2009 @ 2:23 AM

Shit look at the time now! I'm feeling kinda tired but i just can't go to bed. I feel kinda awake. *insomnia symptoms* HAHA. Today (Wed) was one of the most stressful days i've ever experienced, in school. Shit. Really hate this feeling! Thank goodness i went down for training cos seriously running is one good outlet to de-stress. I just felt like running forever, and not stopping. Tired meant nothing to me, as compared to the stress i was feeling the whole day. THANK GOODNESS AGAIN i made a decision to go up to the lab to check out the fyp export. Sorry but i have realised i can only trust myself. Noticed grave mistakes. In editing, having jump cuts is like throwing yourself into a lake of alligators. Hopefully tmr morning cat fixes it. Our lives are in your hands, superheroine! you go, girl! After training, my stomach hurt like hell. Actually i had the feeling of farting during the whole workout! Hahaha sssheesh. My stomach was so pain, i think its the lack of food. I hadn't consumed anything after 1 till 10pm but amazingly i didn't feel hungry. Hmm this's how bad psychological stress can affect a person! But no worries, i came home to my mom's home-cooked soup awww. It made my rumbly tummy felt better. It'll take me some time to get back to my norm lifestyle. That's fo' sure.

K eyelids getting heavy, zzzzz!

Monday, February 16, 2009 @ 11:13 PM

Its weird, how you can feel attached to a stranger/someone you have just recently chat with in a short period of time. Just goes to show that communication is vital! Good or Bad communication can either make or break a relationship, be it friendship or other kinds.

This song puts me at ease <3

FYP is still stressing me out. So much to do and i hate being "supposedly" in charge of the final video just because i am "supposed" to render and export out the whole video just because i have it. I took over the job of compiling because no one will do it and because i'm the only video editor. I'm so worried, i think this have taken its toll on my sleeping habits. I haven't slept well for 3 weeks. I'M SO TIRED!

Back to report.

Sunday, February 15, 2009 @ 4:50 PM

UNLUCKY YET FORTUNATE DAY

I LEFT MY HANDPHONE IN A YELLOW CAB JUST A FEW HRS AGO. I DON'T KNOW WHATS WRONG WITH ME. I HAVEN'T BEEN THINKING RIGHT LATELY, I THINK ITS THE LACK OF SLEEP. SO TIRED, PHYSICALLY AND MENTALLY. ANYWAY THANK GOD! I MET THE BEST CABBY UNCLE.

GUESS WHAT.

BECAUSE HE DIDN'T KNOW HOW TO USE MY PHONE, HE GOT HIS PASSENGER TO RETURN MY CALLS AND DROVE ALLLLLLL THE WAY DOWN TO MY HOUSE FROM ORCHARD TO PERSONALLY HAND ME BACK MY PHONE.

WHERE IN SINGAPORE CAN YOU FIND SUCHA KIND-HEARTED MAN!?

THERE. HIS NAME IS AH HENG OR THATS WHAT HE TOLD ME. REALLY HENG AH! HAHA.

TAKE YELLOW CABS FROM NOW ON.

Friday, February 13, 2009 @ 1:04 PM

Should i go for SIM's open house today? Huimin!!! REPLY ME. My mind's all messed up with different thoughts i can't lay everything down in an organised way. Ok, firstly. I watched "The Secret Life Of Bees" this morning. My mom bought 435413 new dvds again. Ok not so many but you get what i mean! This makes me happy. Movies make me happy. I have something to look forward to, waking up in the morning. Just sitting on my couch, munching away on junk, with eyes glued on the plasma screen. Thats my way of just winding down. Ok, secondly. I need to hop into the shower because i just made a last min decision to go down to school and watch IA's fyp presentation where at the same time, print out some documents for the uni applications. My house's printer is not spoilt but just cannot make it. I have to crack my head (and i think my hands too) just to fix it. Rather make use of school's property since i'm gonna leave soon! Anyway, i think i can say i'm now an unofficial SP gradute. Yesterday was the last assignment/lecture. OMG CAN YOU BELIEVE IT!? I'm DONE. Now i'm left with graduation showcase in march which obviously gonna feel like a 1-man/2-men show again. I hate it. Thirdly, i'm going to continue drawing. I sharpened my pencils 2 nights ago because of a sudden surge of inspiration to start drawing. I miss my charcoal pencils. Something i want to do after i graduate which starts today. Fourth, buy my breadman runner keychain! The one i got with my 3 best buddies. I lost it at Dover station on monday. Freak! I was so devasted. That's like my lucky charm i need to get it before tomorrow's race. Later later later! I got quite a number of tasks to accomplish today. I'm so glad i went to bed at 11+pm last night. I felt good waking up this morning. I slept to my new playlist of songs on my ipod. 235 new songs! Thank you ryan and mp3raid.com. Music really makes the world go round. I don't want to feel like a square. Right now, i look forward to long bus & mrt rides to anywhere and everywhere as long i've got my ipod plugged into my ears. Hmm where was i? Ok fifth. I might dye my hair again. My mom kinda hates it, she has something against black! WHY!? I love black. Black is the new White. Come to think of it, i ask myself "why should i change myself for someone. its my hair damnit" SO i might not dye it. GET USED TO IT!

OK GOTTA GO BATHE NOW!

Wednesday, February 11, 2009 @ 12:14 PM

i want to be in school withnin 1/2hr time but heck, everything seems to be tilting downwards. i am still in my pj. i thought right after i'm done with fyp, things would start to look up but doesn't seem so. tomorrow is the last assignment/presentation and i'm done with digital media, done with SP. time passes so fast!

OK BETTER GO BATHE NOW. GOTTA FLY TO SCHOOL!

Forward to 1:00 and watch till the end. Love this song!

Tuesday, February 10, 2009 @ 1:40 AM

I'm counting my sheep and each one that passes is
another dream to ashes and they all fall down.

And as I lay me down tonight,
I close my eyes, what a beautiful sight

Sleeping to dream about you
And I'm so damn tired of having to live without you
Well, I don't mind
Sleeping to dream about you and I'm so tired

Saturday, February 7, 2009 @ 11:45 AM

I don't know if i'm stressed up or what, but one thing i know for sure... there is still humour & beauty in life that i should take notice of.

Yesterday -
I was probably too overwhelmed with all the work, i started acting crazy

edward: grace, you should join drama club or smth
cat: noooo she should go into the mental hospital

Later at night -

e: you should finish up (fyp work) fast and get home early

Seriously, the last thing i want to face when i get home is the COMPUTER SCREEN but for you, i will!

*****

I'm starving! Gotta be at Bedok Reservoir by 1pm. Damn sianzzzz!

Friday, February 6, 2009 @ 11:14 AM

rescue me

I realised/discovered i've only got myself to rely on. Its finally Friday! I AM SO DAMN PROUD OF MYSELF REALLY. Give me more time and i think i can complete the whole FYP all by myself. Action speaks louder than words DAMNIT. "Gimme smth to do cos i got nth to do bla bla bla" Whats INITIATIVE!? Stop talking like the whole world is at your finger tips while not doing anything. Being in the same room is enough to repel me away. Sick!

I will seriously throw a fit if i sacrafice my training today to stay back while ya'll leave early. I won't take this. ITS THE LAST STRAW!!!